{"id":8392,"date":"2021-04-27T11:34:03","date_gmt":"2021-04-27T17:34:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/?page_id=8392"},"modified":"2021-04-28T08:55:51","modified_gmt":"2021-04-28T14:55:51","slug":"over-the-board","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/?page_id=8392","title":{"rendered":"Over the Board"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Davis MacMillan<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jesse decides to get good at chess. There are a few reasons for this. A big one is that it\u2019s out there, in the culture. People are talking about chess. It also, to him, has always seemed like a smart people game, a game he should be good at as a demonstration of his intelligence and seriousness as a person. Plus, it\u2019s a pandemic. There\u2019s nothing to do and nowhere to go. That means plenty of time for the internet. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He\u2019s not the only person with this idea. According to the chess website he uses, he\u2019s one of about three million. So it\u2019s competitive, even at the beginning. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jesse has a plan though. He\u2019s got a training regimen. More than that he has the willpower to play 100 games a day, and to chase these with chess puzzles and YouTube videos on strategy. He\u2019s got the willpower to force his brain to focus on a board game all of the time. He spends his nights bathed in clips of wan and skinny men talking about the Sicilian and the Nymzo and the Dutch. He plays through old games. He convinces himself (like so many others) that he can find something new in a 100-year-old sequence of moves. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s a thing that experienced players say: the more you know about the game the more it reveals itself as unknowable. Jesse hears (or reads) this a lot. For a while it seems woo woo and then one day it doesn\u2019t. He has spent 18 straight hours running through the shadows of moves in his head. It\u2019s not enough. He doesn\u2019t know anything. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s at this point that the offer is made. He\u2019s down a YouTube rabbit hole, listening to some GM or other walk through the possibilities of the Vienna gambit. The next video loads. It\u2019s clear from the beginning that it\u2019s not a video. Or it\u2019s a video and more than a video. A shadow appears in the shape of a person. It\u2019s black, and the background around it is black as well, but in a way that seems to buzz. The video comes on with a sound like breathing. The figure speaks. \u201cHey Jesse,\u201d it says. \u201cSeems like you like chess.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI do,\u201d is all he says. Three letters, two words. It\u2019s a phrase that\u2019s changed lives before, but it still seems unfair that it should have the power to destroy his. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

What\u2019s the cost? What\u2019s the usual cost in moments like these? His mind, his body, his soul. I\u2019ll have to possess you, the figure says. To get the job done. It\u2019s perfectly safe. You\u2019ll be able to watch. You\u2019ll be able to learn. You can see everything in my brain. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jesse tries to wrap his mind around the offer. In a certain sense he\u2019s already possessed. Isn\u2019t learning about something, at least something this big, an act of possession? The knowledge comes in and shapes the brain to its needs, pushing everything else aside. The internet is the perfect vehicle for such possession. It\u2019s a funnel of information: amoral and gigantic. Just like fucking chess, Jesse thinks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The figure goes on. It\u2019s not that I\u2019ll make you better, it says. It\u2019s that I\u2019ll help you understand. Jesse thinks about the fact that the first chess computer was a man hidden inside a box, writing moves on a piece of paper and beeping and booping with his mouth. He thinks that he can become that box but in reverse: a computer inside of a person. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOK,\u201d he says, condemning himself with one less letter. The figure tells him that they\u2019ll start in the morning. Say your goodbyes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s no one to say goodbye to. There\u2019s not even anything to do. Normally he\u2019d spend the night learning. He\u2019d spend it playing. But he\u2019s about to learn everything. And the thought of playing as himself \u2013 with his flaws and failings and the glaring holes in his game \u2013 makes him sick. He tries to sleep. He can\u2019t sleep. He sits in silence. He watches the sunrise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then it happens. It\u2019s gentle at first, like a glove sliding over his entire body but from the inside. For a while he can still feel himself. Then he can\u2019t. His hands go first. Then his feet. Then even his eyes are someone else\u2019s. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cReady to begin,\u201d the figure asks. Then it laughs. The computer starts up, the game opens with the gentle pop of a notification. He\u2019s black. White moves its e pawn. The piece clicks into place. He barely has time to consider it before the moves flood in. They come first individually and then in lines. They spread out like the roots of a tree. The possibilities explode like a supernova: not outward but inward with a force that crushes him. They move faster. Pawns and knights and rooks and bishops and the queen all in a blinding glare. There\u2019s no possibility of keeping up. He wants to tear out his eyes. He wants to go deeper and tear out his brain. He wants to go back to knowing nothing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

White moves. Black moves. The options explode in front of him again. If he had control of his body he\u2019d pass out. He can\u2019t. He\u2019s trapped. \u201cEnough,\u201d he says. \u201cPlease.\u201d The figure ignores him. It keeps playing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

DAVIS MACMILLAN <\/strong>has had fiction in Wigleaf, Jellyfish Review, JMWW<\/em>, and elsewhere. He lives in New York. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Davis MacMillan Jesse decides to get good at chess. There are a few reasons for this. A big one is that it\u2019s out there, in the culture. People are talking about chess. It also, to him, has always seemed like … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":8387,"menu_order":5,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-8392","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P15duy-2bm","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8392","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8392"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8392\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8430,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8392\/revisions\/8430"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8387"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8392"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}