as<\/em> I\u2019m putting it back in my mouth? I tried the latter and swallowed a mouthful of water, and now I was panicking.<\/p>\nGenevieve, being the prodigious diver that she is, was thirty feet ahead of me and not looking back. I jerked back and forth, searching for the nearest person to help remind me of this very basic skill. My lungs were starting to hurt. I turned around and saw Bill swimming toward me, that old bastard. I could tell it was him by the way his bald head shone, even at depth. Bill was the only retiree with us on the voyage: a Vietnam vet and one of the original frogmen that later became the Navy SEALS. He spent most of his time bitching about how lazy the rest of us were for sleeping in past seven o\u2019clock and about all of the crazy things he\u2019d seen during his lifetime. He was a one-upper, that guy, and I hated him. But right now he was the only one who could help me.<\/p>\n
Seeing me thrash, he swam right up and gave me a confused look when I signed that I was out of air. My regulator, after all, was floating somewhere behind me, and my spare also was still clipped to my side. He took his own spare and popped it into my mouth, like a pacifier, and purged (so it was the first one after all). Once I\u2019d inhaled several deep breaths he motioned to ask whether or not I could continue the dive. I could have, probably, but by this time my nerves were rattled and all I wanted was to surface, to be surrounded by air and to feel the sun on my back and the reassuring pull of gravity underneath. I pointed up and he had no choice but to surface with me. At several points along the way he tried to stop to allow the inert gases to escape our joints and tissues, but I was in no mood for procedure. I kept ascending so he had to either follow or risk me damaging his equipment.<\/p>\n
Our heads broke the surface and the pressure draining out of my ears felt like a balloon expanding.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat\u2019n the hell was that?\u201d Bill cried, signaling Pablo on the boat to come pick me up.<\/p>\n
I murmured something about no air before turning and swimming in the direction of the boat. Not even a thank you. Once I was safely on board I realized I\u2019d never been so happy to be alone. Part of me wanted the rest of them to stay down there, indefinitely, so that I wouldn\u2019t have to invent any stupid lies about decompression sickness. But eventually they came up. Eventually, they always do.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow are you feeling there, sport?\u201d Bill asks me at dinner, patting me on the shoulder as he scoots around my chair and takes his seat. Our dive leader, Eddie, has prepared some calamari. I poke at the tentacles with my fork, the thought of seafood unappetizing.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m fine, Bill,\u201d I say, and feel Genevieve\u2019s hand rest on my opposite thigh.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t worry about him,\u201d she whispers.<\/p>\n
Easier said than done.<\/p>\n
\u201cReckon you\u2019ll be joining us out there any time soon?\u201d he asks.<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d I say. \u201cRight now I\u2019m enjoying just being on the water while y\u2019all are down beneath.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNever heard of anybody signing up for a live-aboard just to sit on top of the water.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cProbably a lot of things you haven\u2019t heard of, Bill.\u201d<\/p>\n
He glances at me sideways and I imagine him coming back with a remark about having to hold your best friend\u2019s hand while he\u2019s dying, or some vet bullshit like that. But he\u2019s quiet.<\/p>\n
\u201cHere you are, darling.\u201d Eddie leans over Genevieve, pouring her another glass of red wine. At the opposite end of the table the other passengers, a Spanish couple who don\u2019t speak any English, say something to him and all three of them laugh. The rest of us just stare, waiting for Eddie to explain. He doesn\u2019t.<\/p>\n
Eventually I pop each of the slimy cephalopods into my mouth and, though they gross me out at first, I see how much Genevieve is enjoying hers and eventually I also begin to enjoy them. The wine helps. By my fourth glass I\u2019m in a much better mood. I even listen while Bill tells us about detonating underwater charges off the coast of Thanh Hoa. After helping clear away the dishes I go on deck and look out over the water. There is a line of orange light on the horizon, although the water around us is inky black. A warm western wind is blowing, and the boat tilts gently in the waves. I haven\u2019t been standing there long before I feel Genevieve\u2019s arms encircle me from behind.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow are you doing?\u201d she whispers in my ear.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m doing good,\u201d I say. \u201cI wish you\u2019d stop asking me that every five seconds.\u201d<\/p>\n
I can tell by the silence that she is hurt, but don\u2019t make any effort to comfort her.\u201d Are you enjoying yourself out here,\u201d she asks at last.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s a beautiful evening,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
\u201cI mean this trip. Our honeymoon.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh.\u201d I think about it. \u201cYeah, I\u2019m enjoying it. I just wish I wasn\u2019t feeling so bad, so that I could do more dives with you. Who are you partnering with while I\u2019m up here?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBill.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re not setting any underwater charges out there, are you? These reefs are protected, you know.\u201d<\/p>\n
She laughs half-heartedly.<\/p>\n
\u201cEvan?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIs it because of what happened the other day? With your regulator?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo. That was an accident.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBecause, you don\u2019t have anything to be embarrassed about\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, I don\u2019t. So why do you feel the need to keep reminding me?\u201d<\/p>\n
Her arms tighten around me. \u201cI\u2019m just trying to — \u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t worry about me. I\u2019m having the time of my life. You just keep enjoying the dives without me. I\u2019ll bet Bill\u2019s better at spotting stuff underwater than I am anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n
This is true, I know. I can tell by the way her arms loosen, ever so slightly.<\/p>\n
The door to the cabin opens and the sound of voices escapes for a moment before it closes again and the Spanish couple joins us at the railing. Their names are Maria and Escobar. They lean against the railing, her arm wrapped in his, and say something to us in Spanish, at which we stare until the woman says, \u201cBeautiful,\u201d gesturing toward the open sea.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, very beautiful,\u201d I say, and it\u2019s true. The middle of the sea is the only place one can go and feel truly isolated. On land, even in the mountains, there are power lines. But here as far as the eye can see there is nothing, no ships, no land masses. Just miles of open water in every direction and worlds beneath not even science has explored. Seventy percent of the Earth\u2019s surface exists three miles beneath my feet. Only a few submersibles in the world can explore depths like that, and even then there are canyons that open into further depths, seven miles down in places, where the pressure is so great even a titanium sphere would crush like a soda can. Scientists can\u2019t imagine what kinds of life might exist in those places, and cannot hope to. Whatever is capable of living at those depths cannot possibly ascend otherwise it would explode. But it\u2019s there. They are there, somewhere beneath our feet.<\/p>\n
We remain on deck for several more minutes and share a spliff with the Spanish couple, before returning to our quarters below. We make love in a heady, vaguely uncomfortable fog then fall asleep without bothering to dress or clean ourselves. The rocking of the ocean causes strange dreams full of half-imagined things, things we cannot remember in the morning. It\u2019s been that way since we embarked. Who knows what kinds of strange communions take place each night in our sleep? All we know is that we wake feeling rested.<\/p>\n
In the morning we rinse ourselves on deck using a portable bladder hung from a metal bar at the stern. We (and by \u201cwe\u201d I mean they) were planning on getting in an early dive, although for some reason the captain is having difficulty locating the site. The buoy that marks it, he says, seems to be missing.<\/p>\n
\u201cI know it\u2019s around here somewhere,\u201d he keeps muttering. We all lean over the side looking for shallow water, the reassuring glimmer of coral in the sunlight. At last we spot it. Eddie uses the forward sonar to figure out where to drop anchor, and in minutes everybody is suited up and ready to go.<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you sure you\u2019re still feeling bad?\u201d Genevieve asks me, buckling her BCD vest and sliding on her fins.<\/p>\n
\u201cYep.\u201d<\/p>\n
One by one, they waddle off the back end, each waiting for the one in front to clear the water before taking a long, awkward stride out and tumbling in after them.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ll keep a look out for pirates while we\u2019re down there, won\u2019t you?\u201d Bill asks me, following behind Genevieve.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou bet,\u201d I murmur.<\/p>\n
God, how I hate that man.<\/p>\n
Once they\u2019re all in the water I watch them lift their inflator valves over their heads and release the air from their vests. Slowly, they begin to sink. Unlike the others, Genevieve has to descend gradually — allergies making it difficult for her ears to equalize all at once. They disappear into the deep, Genevieve last of all, but ultimately her as well, and I climb onto the top deck and lie on my towel in the sun. It turns out I\u2019ve been telling the truth and it really is not so bad being the only one on board, except for Pablo, but he doesn\u2019t talk to me so for all intents and purposes I am alone. I lie on my back and feel the sun press against the skin of my stomach, aware of the boat rocking back and forth beneath me. The waves aren\u2019t too bad. I can only imagine the kind of visibility they\u2019re getting.<\/p>\n
I lie in the sun for about thirty-five minutes before I hear Pablo call to the first couple to surface. I sit up and look over the edge. It\u2019s the Spanish couple and they look wild. They start going off in Spanish: \u201cNo me lo vas a creer lo que est\u00e1 ahi abajo. Nunca he visto nada asi!\u201d<\/p>\n
He talks back to them and it\u2019s clear they\u2019ve seen something pretty strange.<\/p>\n
\u201cY los otros? Donde est\u00e1n?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cTodavia estamos investigando. Nosotros tambi\u00e9n estuvieramos ahi, pero nos falto el aire.\u201d<\/p>\n
I climb down and Escobar pats me on the shoulder. \u201cBig discover,\u201d he says, widening his eyes. \u201cBIG.\u201d<\/p>\n
In another ten minutes I see Genevieve\u2019s head surface and she paddles toward the back of the boat, passing her fins up to Pablo and using the ladder to climb aboard. I help her to her seat. \u201cDid they tell you?\u201d she asks, still dripping, familiar snot streams hanging from her nose.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey told me something, but it was in Spanish. I guess you saw something big? Shark, was it?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, weirder than that.\u201d She\u2019s distracted suddenly by Eddie climbing on board. \u201cWhere\u2019s Bill?\u201d she asks. Eddie struggles to maintain his balance while Pablo helps him off with his tank.<\/p>\n
\u201cDamn fool wouldn\u2019t come up. He\u2019s still down there fiddling with the thing. I waited as long as I could but eventually I ran out of air. He\u2019s got nitro, which lasts longer. Signed that he\u2019d be up in a minute.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cTell Evan what we saw.\u201d<\/p>\n
He removes his wet suit and takes a seat in the sun in his speedo. His body is nearly orange from being on dive boats his whole life and the hair on his chest is bleach blonde. \u201cWell, honestly I\u2019m not sure. I mean, at really extreme depths there\u2019s supposed to be these underwater brine pools that have a higher salinity than normal seawater, which explains why they\u2019re distinct, but we\u2019re talking bottom of the ocean here. I don\u2019t think that\u2019s what\u2019s down there. With brine pools, the methane usually causes colonies of mussels to form around it, but there was none of that and the salinity, I would think, should make the pool look murky. Doesn\u2019t explain the weird shimmer the one down there has.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSo you found an underwater pool,\u201d I venture.<\/p>\n
\u201cSomething like that. Like I said, I don\u2019t know what it is, but I\u2019m pretty sure it\u2019s new. I\u2019ve never seen or heard of anything like it before.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWas it here the last time you dove?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell that\u2019s the thing,\u201d he says, looking around and scanning the water as if for landmarks. \u201cThis ain\u2019t the spot I was trying to take us to. I\u2019m pretty sure it\u2019s in this vicinity, but the buoy isn\u2019t here, and once I got down there it was pretty obvious I haven\u2019t been here before. How I\u2019ve been missing it all these years, I don\u2019t know.\u201d<\/p>\n
At the back of the boat Bill is passing his fins up to Pablo.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey, Bill,\u201d Eddie says once he\u2019s seated. \u201cI know you\u2019ve got a longer air supply than the rest of us, but when I come up I need you to come with me. It\u2019s a liability thing, you understand?\u201d<\/p>\n
Bill nods without lifting his eyes.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou okay?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah, I\u2019m fine.\u201d His voice sounds distant.<\/p>\n
\u201cFigure anything else out?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know. Tried dropping a few rocks and shells into it, but nothing happened. They just sat on its surface and wouldn\u2019t go under. Then I tried to force them under with my hand just for a second and it felt like it was being swallowed whole. The pressure\u2026it was intense.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPressure? In the water?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThink so.\u201d He lifts his hand in front of his face, tries making a fist but can hardly move it. \u201cStill don\u2019t really have much feeling.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLemme take a look at that,\u201d Eddie says, and we all crowd in close while he removes his glove. The hand he shows us is black and blue and seems nearly half the size of the other one. \u201cJesus, Bill! It looks like every bone in your hand is broken!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt don\u2019t hurt.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCan you feel anything?\u201d<\/p>\n
He waits a moment, then shakes his head. Eddie gets up and begins to pace in the sun at the back of the boat. He looks at his watch. \u201cAlright, here\u2019s what we do,\u201d he says. \u201cWe\u2019ve got another half hour before we can go down again\u2026What do you guys say we stay here today, check this thing out? Tomorrow we\u2019ll call in the coast guard and they\u2019ll bring an army of marine biologists, but right now how would you guys like to be a part of something new and current — a goddamn scientific discovery?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSi,\u201d says Escobar.<\/p>\n
\u201cAin\u2019t even a choice as far as I\u2019m concerned,\u201d says Bill. \u201cYou get to be my age and anything new comes along, you better be up for the ride.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCan you dive with your hand like that?\u201d Genevieve asks, and Bill laughs.<\/p>\n
\u201cHoney, I\u2019ve dove with a broken leg before, bullets stuck in my hip\u2026 believe me, a sore hand ain\u2019t nothing.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cRight, but this situation with your hand teaches us something,\u201d Eddie says. \u201cIf we\u2019re going to mess around with this thing we\u2019ve got to be careful. We don\u2019t know what it is, or what it\u2019s capable of. Could be a living organism for all we know. I know we\u2019re all seasoned and competent, but in order to do this and make sure everybody\u2019s safe, I really need you all to follow my lead.\u201d<\/p>\n
They nod their heads, except for me. Bill notices.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat d\u2019you say, sport? Still decompressing?\u201d<\/p>\n
I glare at him. \u201cThink so,\u201d I say, as amiably and regretfully as I can manage. \u201cYou guys will just have to give me a full report of what you see down there.\u201d<\/p>\n
Genevieve stares at me like her feelings are hurt. The potential symbolism of this is too much for her: encountering something entirely new together on our honeymoon, literally making a scientific discovery. I\u2019m becoming more cynical. I mean, isn\u2019t everything a new experience? Isn\u2019t everything, if you look closely enough, a new discovery? Even our cells regenerate at a rate that, every seven years or so, we\u2019re entirely new people. But this isn\u2019t the kind of newness Genevieve appreciates. Me neither, really.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019ll give you the spark notes,\u201d Bill says, smirking.<\/p>\n
While they wait for the surface interval to time out, we have a lunch of peanut butter sandwiches and fruit, with plenty of water. Breathing through a regulator tends to dry out one\u2019s mouth, so for them the lunch is bursting with flavor. For me though, it\u2019s kind of bland. While we wait for the last ten minutes to go by, everyone is silent, watching their time pieces and dive computers for the green light. At last they start to suit up again. Genevieve remains holding my hand.<\/p>\n
\u201cAren\u2019t you going down with them?\u201d I ask.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, I want to stay up here with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat for?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJust because,\u201d she says. \u201cWe need to be together.\u201d<\/p>\n
I\u2019m touched by the sacrifice, but at the same time the thought of both of us waiting up here is more shameful somehow than if it were just me alone. Ruining my own honeymoon is bad enough; I don\u2019t want to be responsible for hers too, especially given the circumstances.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think you should go down with them,\u201d I say, and she looks at me.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBecause I want to know what\u2019s down there, and I\u2019m relying on you for all the juicy details. Plus, who\u2019s going to be Bill\u2019s dive partner? I mean, look at the guy\u2026 he could have a stroke at any moment and who would be there to help him?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEvan, something\u2019s happening to us. I don\u2019t know what it is, but I just really feel like we need to stay together right now. Okay? This is our honeymoon.\u201d She looks at me and I can feel her eyes pleading for me to come with them, to get my gear on and quit being such a pussy. Not all of that, of course, but that\u2019s what it feels like.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou go, babe,\u201d I say. \u201cI want to be by myself anyway. The quiet is good for me.\u201d<\/p>\n
She studies my eyes, searching them for subtext — a secret request that isn\u2019t quite coming through in words. She must find none because a moment later she sighs and zips up her dive skin, slides her arms through her BCD vest and starts to get ready. \u201cThis isn\u2019t the honeymoon I had in mind,\u201d she says in a low voice.<\/p>\n
I say that I\u2019m sorry, wanting it to be vague, but we both know what I\u2019m talking about.<\/p>\n
Once they\u2019re all underneath I return to my spot on the top deck, although the sky is overcast and there isn\u2019t much sun to soak up right now. I stand up there, alone, and stare out at the unimpeded sky and sea, at the blurry spot on the horizon where the two of them meet. I am struck suddenly by the full magnitude of my error, choosing this for our honeymoon. I feel small out here, and that is not the way a man should feel on his honeymoon.<\/p>\n
I climb down from the top deck and up front I can hear a beeping noise. Pablo has been sitting with his feet up, listening to something through a pair of headphones, but now he yanks them off and stares at one of the monitors beside the steering wheel. \u201cChingada madre,\u201d he breathes.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
He doesn\u2019t answer at first, but rushes to the side of the boat and peers over the edge into the water, does the same on the other side.<\/p>\n
\u201cPablo, what is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d he says, still trying to see something beneath the water. \u201cRadar picked up something. Could be a mistake though. Something very big.\u201d<\/p>\n
I look at the monitor. On the screen there is a large red circle designating the area around the boat. I can see five smaller forms — whom I presume to be the divers — off the stern. In front of us is a large amorphous shape that looks roughly the size of a submarine.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat the hell is that, Pablo?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know, there is no room for an object like that at this depth. I\u2019m thinking it\u2019s a mistake.\u201d<\/p>\n
I look back to the screen and can see that the object, whatever it is, is circling to our starboard side, toward the divers. \u201cIt\u2019s moving over here,\u201d I say, and we both rush to the starboard side of the boat. The water there is choppy and without any sun the surface appears cold and impenetrable.<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you see anything?\u201d I ask, and he shakes his head, but then an immense shadow appears on the water in front of us — or is it a cloud passing overhead? — before disappearing just as suddenly.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat do we do?\u201d I ask.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere is nothing we can do except be ready in case they surface.\u201d<\/p>\n
I wait at the stern for another twenty minutes before they reappear. During this time Pablo has managed to relax; the shape has disappeared on the radar although he can still see our companions swimming up near the prow. I continue to be anxious until I see Genevieve\u2019s head break the surface and her pulling herself in by a rope attached to the stern.<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you guys alright?\u201d I ask once they\u2019re on board and struggling to remove their gear.<\/p>\n
Eddie looks at me. \u201cWhy do you ask?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDid you see anything down there?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAnything<\/em>?\u201d<\/p>\nPablo explains what we saw on the sonar and Eddie shrugs. \u201cMust have been a malfunction of some kind. We didn\u2019t see anything, barely any fish even. It\u2019s like the reef is deserted.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, what did<\/em> you see?\u201d<\/p>\n\u201cWe found a couple of other smaller pools hidden inside some of the coral formations. Look to be the same kind, although we haven\u2019t been able to figure out what they are yet. I tried lowering my weight belt into it and almost as soon as I did I felt some pressure take hold of it and it disappeared. That\u2019s why we had to come up so early. I couldn\u2019t stay down without it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt disappeared? Like something grabbed it?\u201d<\/p>\n
He laughs. \u201cNo, nothing like that. I think what we\u2019re dealing with though is pressure. For some reason these pools contain enormous amounts of pressure. I think it made my weights heavier and that\u2019s what sucked them under. Also explains what happened to Bill\u2019s hand.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHow is that possible though?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ve got me. I\u2019ve never seen anything like it, although I would like to poke around down there some more before calling in the coast guard. When you get to be my age you have to seize opportunities like this one. That is, if it\u2019s okay with the rest of you?\u201d<\/p>\n
We all shrug and nod, except for Bill, who says, \u201cI hear you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGood. Well, according to the chart we\u2019ve got to take an hour-and-a-half surface interval this time, which should leave us just enough time for one more dive before dusk.\u201d<\/p>\n
The sky is overcast now and we\u2019ve all been on deck for a while. Most of us choose to wait out the interval in our cabins.<\/p>\n
\u201cI want to shower,\u201d Genevieve says once we\u2019re below, \u201cbut I know I\u2019m just going to get dirty again.\u201d She removes her dive skin and the bikini swimsuit beneath it, wraps her hair in a towel, and lies down on the made-up bed beside me. I lower my lips to her shoulder and taste the salt still clinging to her.<\/p>\n
\u201cDirty girl,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019d rather not,\u201d she says. \u201cI\u2019m so exhausted from all the diving.\u201d<\/p>\n
I stop kissing her. \u201cYou can rest. I\u2019ll do most of the work.\u201d<\/p>\n
She smiles. \u201cEvan, what can we do to get this honeymoon back on track?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t know it was off track.\u201d<\/p>\n
She waits a moment: \u201cI know you\u2019re afraid of going down again.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat do you mean \u2018afraid\u2019? I\u2019ve been diving longer than you have, sweetheart.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not trying to insult you. I don\u2019t even blame you. It was probably really scary what happened, and if it were me, I wouldn\u2019t want to dive for a while either. But we can\u2019t keep being separate here, not acknowledging it. If you want to stay on the boat instead of dive, that\u2019s fine, but I want to stay with you. What\u2019s important isn\u2019t the diving or discovering some new sea thing\u2026it\u2019s that we\u2019re together.\u201d<\/p>\n
My eyes become bleary for a moment and I consider again how it felt being underwater suddenly without air, how my mind drew a blank despite all the training.<\/p>\n
\u201cLook, I understand how it must seem to you. But the truth is that I\u2019m just not feeling well. Maybe it\u2019s decompression sickness or maybe it\u2019s something else, but I just don\u2019t want to dive right now. I don\u2019t want that to ruin your time. You should keep diving. Enjoy yourself. We\u2019re paying for it, after all. Anything less would be a waste.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBut I told you, I don\u2019t care about that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know, but I do! I don\u2019t want to be the cause, do you understand? It\u2019s bad enough that I\u2019m stuck up here myself, but if you are too it\u2019s only going to make it worse for me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBut I want<\/em> to be with you.\u201d<\/p>\nI sigh. Her devotion is infuriating.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow about this,\u201d I say. \u201cIt\u2019s the depth that bothers me — what if while you guys are diving I snorkel on the surface. That way I\u2019ll be able to see you, you can look up and see me. I\u2019ll be able to contribute to the conversation about stuff when we all come up. How would that be?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t want to force you to do anything you\u2019re not comfortable with.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSnorkeling would be fine,\u201d I say. \u201cHonestly. In fact, I\u2019m surprised I didn\u2019t think of it sooner.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWill you be able to with the sea this rough?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s worth a try.\u201d<\/p>\n
Now she smiles and I smile too, happy to have come up with a solution finally. I lower my mouth to her shoulder again and can feel her relax beneath me. I remove my shirt and shorts, climb on top of her, knock the towel off of her head and cradle her damp hair in the crook of my arm.<\/p>\n
Once we finish, we both put our swimsuits on and carry our dive skins up to the deck. Genevieve hangs hers on a railing to dry. Bill is seated on the bench nearest the stern and is staring off into infinity. In his lap, his injured hand is cradled, moving slightly, unsuccessfully attempting to open and close.<\/p>\n
\u201cSee anything out there?\u201d Genevieve asks, smiling. He turns, surprised.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo. Nothing that wasn\u2019t already there, anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGuess who\u2019s going to be joining us this time on the surface?\u201d<\/p>\n
He raises his eyebrows and she turns to indicate me. I look away.<\/p>\n
\u201cOn the surface?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019s going to snorkel.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, good for him, I guess.\u201d He turns back to the horizon.<\/p>\n
\u201cStill another half hour before we can go down,\u201d Genevieve says. \u201cI\u2019m going to go make a sandwich. You want one?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSure, I\u2019ll come with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s alright. Kitchen\u2019s cramped anyway.\u201d She looks at me significantly and then at Bill.<\/p>\n
\u201cBeg your pardon?\u201d I say, but she just smiles, turns and disappears beneath the deck.<\/p>\n
I look back at Bill and he is still gazing at the ocean, holding his injured hand. \u201cHow\u2019s the hand?\u201d I ask, inching a bit closer and reluctantly taking a seat on the bench opposite him.<\/p>\n
He doesn\u2019t turn. \u201cIt\u2019s fine,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you able to move it alright?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s fine,\u201d he glances at me fiercely out of the corner of his eye before returning to the horizon. We\u2019re silent for several moments, and I consider giving up. I don\u2019t even like the old bastard, but something about the way he\u2019s seated, the contemplative air around him, interests me.<\/p>\n
\u201cAny idea what it is down there?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNope.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou seem interested in them. You ever see anything like them before?\u201d<\/p>\n
He glances at me again. \u201cNo.\u201d And he waits a moment, as if considering whether or not to tell me what he\u2019s thinking. At last he sighs. \u201cThere were times during the war when I wished I had. When I was underwater and enemy boats were humming over the surface, sometimes I\u2019d imagine something real similar to what\u2019s down there: a pool, or a portal of some kind that I could enter into and be home again, or at least someplace tropical.\u201d He smiles, and I smile too despite myself. \u201cI imagined meeting my wife on a beach somewhere. Surprising her. Just coming up out of the water in my scuba gear and catching her there in a swimsuit, a daiquiri in her hand.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhere is she now?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDead three years. Stroke.\u201d<\/p>\n
Somehow I\u2019d known this to be the case, and I try to convince myself it wasn\u2019t cruelty that made me ask. \u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d I say. He doesn\u2019t answer.<\/p>\n
Genevieve returns with two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. We eat in silence. Twenty minutes later Eddie joins us on deck, followed by Pablo, then Escobar and Maria.<\/p>\n
\u201cReady for one last dive before we call it a night?\u201d Eddie asks.<\/p>\n
We all nod and murmur assent, slowly start to suit up.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou joining us this time, Evan?\u201d he asks me, seeing me pulling on my fins and strapping my dive knife uselessly to my calf.<\/p>\n
\u201cJust on the surface,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n
\u201cPretty choppy out there. Visibility might not be so good.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIf it\u2019s too rough I\u2019ll come in.\u201d<\/p>\n
He nods and glances once at Pablo before going to suit up himself. As usual I watch the procession of waddling individuals in scuba gear march off the back end of the boat before following after them. When it\u2019s Genevieve\u2019s turn, she turns and smiles at me — her face all mashed against the dive mask — before fitting her mouth around the regulator and taking one long stride off the back end, tumbling into the water. I follow and stand there for a moment looking at their heads bobbing together in a little group, disappearing one by one beneath the surface, replaced by streams of air bubbles. The boat rocks from side to side and the water has the look of steel. I\u2019ve already lost sight of the others beneath it, except for their bubbles.<\/p>\n
\u201cCompadre, a donde vas?\u201d Pablo calls from the captain\u2019s chair. Without answering I take a long stride out into the water after them. We\u2019ve been without sun most of the day by this point and the water is cold. Seawater splashes into my snorkel and I have to tread water in order to clear it. Pablo, I can see, is at the back of the boat. He touches his head with his right hand and I do the same — the international sign for okay<\/em> — then press my face beneath the surface and watch the others sinking, anchored to five streams of bubbles.<\/p>\nThe waves have me rocking from side to side, and the visibility is not good anyway from all of the silt being stirred up, but from where I am I can just barely make them out and recognize who is who. I recognize Genevieve by the red and navy on her wet suit. They are waiting on the bottom for her to work her way down, and once she arrives they proceed in a line behind Eddie. I cannot make out the reef very well. At this depth it looks like a great, ragged shadow throwing each of the divers into relief. The floor is probably fifty feet down, and not too far off I can see where the shelf drops off into open water, a spectrum of blue darkening into murk.<\/p>\n
Genevieve flips onto her back and looks up at me, gives me two thumbs up. I return the gesture although I suspect anything I do will be lost in the light of the surface around me. I can see Bill swimming several yards ahead of her, not bothering to look around or to investigate the reef like the others. He is focused. It\u2019s the pool he\u2019s interested in. I try to follow and to remain directly above them, which feels strange and voyeuristic in a way, not to mention lonely. Every now and then I lift my head just to make sure I\u2019m not going to run into the boat motor or anything, although each time I do this I find an infinite plane of grey distending in front of me.<\/p>\n
Below I can see that the procession has stopped and is gathered around something. I cannot tell what it is, but by its shape and the dull sense of color I\u2019m able to discern it looks just like a rather large piece of coral. And yet it has captured their interest, even Bill\u2019s — all of them hover around it, inverted, the Spanish couple snapping pictures with their underwater camera. I continue to puzzle over what it could be when I suddenly notice, about twenty yards distant from them, the pool. Because of the poor visibility everything surrounding it appears foggy and indistinct; it, however, seems to shimmer even at this depth. It is silver and beautiful, and judging by the size of the divers relative to it I would guess it\u2019s about six-by-six feet in diameter. I forget about the divers and swim until I am directly above the pool — the water here, I\u2019d reckon, is about seventy feet — and there allow myself to float, buoyed by the passing waves and hypnotized by the silver shimmer of the pool beneath me, the way it captures what little light there is and reflects it in a way that seems almost like a gesture, though one incomprehensible to me.<\/p>\n
I watch it for what feels like several minutes before the others finally make their way over to it, obstructing my view. I wish suddenly that I had my own gear and that I too was able to inspect it up close, perhaps even touch it, maybe, although that didn\u2019t work out so well for Bill. I lift my head from the water and wheel about so that I am facing the boat. I\u2019m surprised to see that I\u2019m nearly one hundred yards out. On the prow I see Pablo stand and lift his right hand to his head. I lift my right hand to my head, and begin to swim back in its direction.<\/p>\n
\n\n\n| <\/td>\n | (go to page 2 –>)<\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n <\/p>\n \n\n\n| (<– return to page 1)<\/a><\/td>\n | <\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n \nBack on the boat I wait another twenty-five minutes before the first divers appear. It\u2019s the Spanish couple again, followed by Genevieve and Eddie. Bill, once again, has elected to stay down by himself and I can see that Eddie is annoyed. We all shower off on the back of the boat and hang our dive skins and wet suits out to dry. By the time we\u2019re finished Bill is climbing up the ladder. Eddie helps him to his seat and I can see him whispering something to him. Judging by Bill\u2019s face, I\u2019m assuming it\u2019s a reprimand.<\/p>\n Once we\u2019ve rinsed off we return to our cabins and get dressed for dinner. Genevieve and I both put on jeans, which feels terrific after a day spent in bathing suits. \u201cSo what did you guys find down there?\u201d I ask.<\/p>\n She smiles. \u201cJust wait,\u201d she says. \u201cYou\u2019re not going to believe it.\u201d<\/p>\n In the main cabin, Eddie already has the table set and Pablo is working on a sailor\u2019s version of paella with shrimp, blue crab, clams, and mussels. Once he\u2019s finished setting the table, Eddie slams a handle of Sailor Jerry\u2019s in the middle of it. \u201cThis feels like a rum night,\u201d he says. We start with rum and cokes and already have a nice buzz going when it\u2019s time to eat. On land, the paella would be merely passable, but out here it is a meal fit for a king. By the time we finish there is no more coke but still some rum, so we drink it straight, except for Bill who waves it off with a conciliatory smile. Nobody bothers to clear off the table; by now we\u2019re listening to Eddie describe what it was they found, particularly Pablo and I, who didn\u2019t get to see it first hand.<\/p>\n \u201cI thought it was a piece of coral at first. Even when I was right on top of it — I couldn\u2019t think of anything else it could be, and, in fact, I\u2019m still kind of stumped on that score. But it wasn\u2019t like any type of coral I\u2019d ever seen before, and I knew it wasn\u2019t there on the first dive. It was red and grainy, bits and pieces of it detaching in the current, and what\u2019s more, I could see that the mass itself wasn\u2019t attached to anything. It shifted back and forth on the sea floor. When I investigated its bottom side I noticed a strange film covering it, transparent as far as I could tell, although whenever the thing shifted it would glimmer just a little in the light.\u201d He stares as if waiting for Pablo and me to draw our own conclusions. I can\u2019t tell whether or not Pablo has solved it, but with this much rum in me I\u2019m in no mood to play detective.<\/p>\n \u201cAnd?\u201d I say.<\/p>\n \u201cIt was skin<\/em>,\u201d he says. \u201cLike a fish\u2019s, although the only fish I\u2019ve ever heard of with skin like that live only in deep water.\u201d<\/p>\n\u201cSo it was a fish?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo, just a piece of one.\u201d<\/p>\n I blink and look at the others to see how they are taking this information. \u201cAnd where was the rest of it?\u201d<\/p>\n He shrugs. \u201cA better question is what was it to begin with, and how did it get here? All of the fish I know that have skin similar to that live at such depths they literally can\u2019t ascend because the lack of pressure would kill them. They\u2019re all a lot smaller too than whatever this thing is.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWell, it doesn\u2019t seem like it\u2019s survived exactly either.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo, but it would have died long before making it to this depth. A hundred feet is nothing. There are places not too far from here that are seven miles deep. That\u2019s over thirty-five thousand feet. You can feel in your ears the pressure at one hundred; can you imagine what it must be like at that depth? Most biologists doubt life is capable of existing there. We know more about the moon\u2026hell, we know more about nearly every planet in our solar system than we do about the bottom of the ocean.\u201d<\/p>\n There are several beats of silence before Genevieve says, \u201cThe pool?\u201d<\/p>\n Eddie nods. \u201cGotta think they\u2019re related, although who knows, really? We\u2019re so far beyond anything currently known about the ocean at this point. I\u2019ve gotta tell you though, personally, I\u2019m not ready to call it in.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cMe neither,\u201d Bill chimes.<\/p>\n The rest of us look around at one another and nod uncertainly.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat do you want to do, then?\u201d Genevieve asks.<\/p>\n \u201cWell, I thought I\u2019d put it to you guys. You\u2019re the paying customers, after all. We can either call it in tomorrow, wait for the scientists to arrive, then head out to continue our diving elsewhere, or we can stay here and keep going down until we feel satisfied we\u2019ve seen everything there is to see with our limited means, then call in the fuzz. It\u2019s up to you.\u201d<\/p>\n Bill leans forward. \u201cWell, you all know my vote. I\u2019m old and most reefs at this point are just configurations of things I\u2019ve seen elsewhere.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cShall we put it to a vote, then?\u201d Eddie asks, studying each of our faces.<\/p>\n We nod.<\/p>\n \u201cAll in favor of staying?\u201d<\/p>\n Slowly, we all raise our hands, Bill last, a satisfied smirk on his face.<\/p>\n \u201cAll opposed?\u201d<\/p>\n Nothing.<\/p>\n \u201cWell that settles it. We\u2019ll go down again tomorrow morning.\u201d<\/p>\n It\u2019s mine and Genevieve\u2019s turn to clear away the dishes, so we do that, rinsing them off in the sink and leaving them there for Pablo to finish up in the morning. Suddenly there is a dull thud and the floor beneath us vibrates, as though from impact.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat was that?\u201d Genevieve asks.<\/p>\n Several seconds go by, all of our senses tuned to our surroundings, unconsciously trying to perceive whether or not we are sinking. Then it happens again: a dull pounding that sounds like it\u2019s coming from beneath us, something throwing itself against the hull of the boat. We grasp at the handrails and pull ourselves up on deck. The others are all gathered at the port bow.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s going on?\u201d I call out to them. Bill gestures with his head for us to join them. Slowly, and with the sounds continuing beneath us, we move to the railing and are shocked to see the water churning. But no: it\u2019s not the water that\u2019s moving — something beneath it. What I first took for movement appears to be shadows, huge ones, shifting back and forth beneath the surface. Another muted sound of impact and suddenly it disappears.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat in the hell\u2026?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou wondered how that piece of meat got down there,\u201d Bill says with a smile. \u201cI\u2019m thinking there\u2019s going to be a whole lot more tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n I move to the other side where Eddie is. \u201cWhat\u2019s happening?\u201d I whisper.<\/p>\n \u201cEvan, I have no fucking idea. You want to see something really weird: look over there, roughly where the pool is beneath the water, and wait for another one of those explosions. Wait for it\u2026There! You see it?\u201d<\/p>\n Sure enough, there is a dull flash of neon in the general vicinity of the pool that quickly diminishes into darkness.<\/p>\n I am speechless.<\/p>\n After several minutes the \u201cexplosions\u201d become further apart. As they do, the brief flashes of color cease to be so brief. Color appears to bleed beneath the surface of the water: aqua, neon, as well as colors I don\u2019t believe I\u2019ve ever seen before, all phosphorescent and glowing.<\/p>\n \u201cYou know,\u201d Eddie says quietly, without taking his eyes away, \u201cmost deep sea marine life still have eyes just like us, though the sun doesn\u2019t reach down that far. In order to see many creatures have evolved to create their own light inside of their bodies.\u201d<\/p>\n Bill turns. \u201cSeeing ain\u2019t the only thing they use it for.\u201d<\/p>\n This seems to jolt Eddie from his reverie. \u201cNo. No, it isn\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cTell \u2018em what else they use it for.\u201d<\/p>\n Eddie clears his throat. \u201cSome deep water fish use the light they make as lures, primitive forms of hypnotism to draw other organisms close. It\u2019s a tool for hunting.\u201d<\/p>\n This information snaps us all back to attention.<\/p>\n \u201cYou don\u2019t think\u2026\u201d Genevieve begins.<\/p>\n \u201cNo, I don\u2019t think. But there\u2019s not a whole lot we can do about it at this point. My suggestion is that we all retire to our cabins, try to get a good night\u2019s rest, and we\u2019ll see what we can find out in the morning.\u201d<\/p>\n Genevieve looks to me and I nod, and we turn to go to bed. The Spanish couple does the same, and Eddie, and Pablo; all except for Bill, who remains still against the railing, watching, dreaming, long after we\u2019ve disappeared below deck.<\/p>\n Genevieve and I lie awake in bed. Not long after, the dull explosions start again, reverberating against the hull. \u201cWhat do you think it is?\u201d she asks.<\/p>\n \u201cEddie seems to know.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, but how do you think they got here? What is the pool?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t know, babe. Some kind of portal, I should think.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBut where did it come from? Who put it there?\u201d<\/p>\n I have no answers for her.<\/p>\n \u201cDo you think it works in reverse, too?\u201d<\/p>\n At this I turn to her in the dark, attempt to study her features through the shadow, but the darkness is implacable. \u201cNot sure it\u2019s worth finding out,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n She takes a minute to respond. \u201cNo, I suppose not. Honeymoon isn\u2019t the time to be exploring new worlds. Enough is happening in this one.\u201d She cuddles up against me, holding me across my chest.<\/p>\n Yes<\/em>, I think. So much is happening<\/em>, and I hold her tight as well, allowing my eyelids to become heavy, lulled to sleep by the pulsing sound of another world crying out below.<\/p>\nThe next morning we wake well rested. I nearly leap out of bed, I\u2019m so energetic. I stand naked in the middle of our cabin, listening. The explosions, it seems, have stopped.<\/p>\n \u201cAre you going to dive with us today?\u201d Genevieve asks, sitting up and rubbing sleep from her eyes.<\/p>\n \u201cI think I will,\u201d I say. \u201cYes, today I\u2019m feeling pretty good.\u201d<\/p>\n On deck everyone is already zipping up their wetsuits.<\/p>\n \u201cYou guys sleep well?\u201d Eddie asks cheerfully.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah, we really did.\u201d<\/p>\n Eddie also seems well rested, as does Pablo, and the Spanish couple. The only one who doesn\u2019t is Bill. His eyes are heavy and blood shot, his face unshaven. No one knows how late he stayed up watching the water because he won\u2019t talk to anyone. He keeps to himself, checking the valves on his tank, his regulator, checking his dive computer.<\/p>\n \u201cAlright,\u201d Eddie says, suited up and standing in the middle of the deck. \u201cI feel the need to disclaim what we\u2019re doing here beforehand. We\u2019re diving now out of curiosity, out of a desire to know exactly what it was we saw last night. There\u2019s no telling what we\u2019ll find down there. The silence suggests that whatever might have been a threat last night is a threat no longer, although I want to stress the fact that we can\u2019t know for sure. If you go down with us you\u2019re accepting that fact, the risk and<\/em> the possible reward. Agreed?\u201d<\/p>\nWe all nod our heads.<\/p>\n \u201cOut loud, please.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAgreed.\u201d<\/p>\n Pablo translates for the Spanish couple. \u201cSi,\u201d they say together.<\/p>\n \u201cAlright then, follow me.\u201d He turns and, after issuing a few instructions to Pablo, pulls his mask down and places his regulator inside his mouth, begins waddling toward the back of the boat. We all do the same, following after him.<\/p>\n It\u2019s a beautiful day for diving: not a cloud in the sky and, compared to the last few days, the sea is relatively calm. Visibility should be excellent.<\/p>\n Behind Eddie is the Spanish couple, followed by Bill, followed at last by Genevieve and me. Eddie stands at the edge for several moments staring at the water before taking a giant stride and tumbling into the ocean. We wait for him to resurface and to give us a report of what\u2019s beneath him. After putting his face in the water and looking around he waves us in. One by one, we all stride out. It feels good to be in my scuba gear again. I breathe deeply into my regulator in order to test it, to convince myself that what happened last time will not happen again. But these assurances aren\u2019t necessary — I know that this time it will all be fine.<\/p>\n I\u2019m the last into the water and with a full wet suit on it feels fantastic, the perfect temperature. I feel the way it floods my BCD, seeps into my wetsuit, and refreshes my skin. Once we\u2019re all in the water Pablo stands at the end of the boat and brings his right hand to his head, we all do the same then turn to Eddie, who nods, and we each press the release valve on our BCDs and slowly begin to descend.<\/p>\n As soon as we\u2019re under we can see we\u2019ve entered a landscape of gore. The reef beneath us, it seems, has disappeared, replaced by humongous piles of fish meat which, in their own way, resemble coral in the formations they make. Hovering above it is a faint aura of red, tiny bits of flesh the current has disengaged. The sun catches the bits of skin and the whole thing sparkles like crystal.<\/p>\n I look at Genevieve and signal to ask whether she is okay. She nods her head, although I can see her eyes are red.<\/p>\n The others descend straight away, although I stay with Genevieve while she gradually makes her way down, desperately trying to equalize so that she won\u2019t miss anything. Visibility is so good though we can see nearly everything from where we are, clear to the other side of the reef where, I can see, the pool remains, shimmering.<\/p>\n The others wait at the bottom until we\u2019ve descended, then set out in a line behind Eddie. Genevieve and I are in back although we can see Bill up ahead nearly on top of Eddie, too polite to pass him but too eager to hang back any further. We swim over the top of the reef, examining the piles of meat for signs of life, or at least a piece of flesh that can help identify the creatures. There are none though. There aren\u2019t even any fish, predatory or otherwise, nibbling at it.<\/p>\n This last bit, I realize, is concerning. We\u2019re basically swimming over a mountain of chum, and the scent should be drawing in predators from miles around. The fact that it\u2019s not is indicative of something, although I\u2019m not sure what. Whatever the threat is that keeps them away surely doesn\u2019t appear to be living<\/em>.<\/p>\nAt one point I reach out and touch a piece of fish. I\u2019m surprised by how delicate it is. It feels like a half-inflated balloon, not solid like you would expect meat to be. It seems somehow empty inside.<\/p>\n After investigating the reef for fifteen minutes, Eddie leads us back to the pool. What we\u2019re supposed to discover here, I have no idea. We\u2019ve learned already that we cannot touch it, whatever we drop inside of it simply disappears, seeming to be pulled in. Are we just going to wait and see if anything comes out? Honestly, I don\u2019t care, because it\u2019s my first time seeing the thing up close and it is beautiful — bigger and more brilliant than it appeared from the surface. Staring into it, I lose track of what the others are doing. The way it shimmers\u2026it\u2019s like glass or liquid silver, maybe. I don\u2019t know how long it has been when I\u2019m finally able to tear my eyes away, but when I look up I see that the others are all doing the same thing. They are all gathered in a circle around the pool, weightless, floating in a single position and staring down into it, like a coven of witches around a pentagram, mindless, hypnotized.<\/p>\n I realize then that something is wrong. I can tell, ironically, by how natural this all feels. I test myself by trying to make myself move, just a little, just a couple of kicks upward, but I cannot. My limbs feel heavy and rigid, as though they are filled with cement, and my eyes have refocused now on the pool, vast and beautiful, like a giant tear-filled eye. I\u2019m locked in a battle with myself. I must move. I must warn the others. It\u2019s not right, whatever this thing is. It is not right for it to be so beautiful, so captivating. The more I struggle internally, the more I can feel it in relation to me, as though the eye is turning now in my direction, focusing on me specifically and compelling me to be still. Suddenly it no longer seems beautiful. I am able to see it for the malevolent thing that it is, its predatory nature. What it wants to do with us, I have no idea. Is this some kind of living organism? Is it hunting us for nourishment, or something more sinister than that; something fundamentally more wrong? Either way, one thing seems certain to me: we are prey.<\/p>\n I am able to tear my eyes away for a moment and I look up toward the surface, which, from this depth, looks like a solid plane of light, like the floor of heaven, which would of course make this hell. With a Herculean effort I\u2019m able to kick one leg free, and the rest of my body follows naturally. I turn to Genevieve and grab her by the bicep. At first she doesn\u2019t respond, but I knock against her mask with my fist and this gets her attention. The eyes she turns toward me bear the confused, panicky expression of a child. Something is wrong, she realizes, just not what or how she should handle it. I motion toward the surface, and this seems to frighten her more. Somehow I must communicate what I know. I point at the pool and then draw a line across my throat. When she still seems confused, I point to it again and make the sign for a shark, my hand shaped like a fin atop my forehead. At last she seems to understand. I can see she cannot move though. I grab her beneath her arms and begin to pull her upwards until at last her limbs are able to move themselves.<\/p>\n I\u2019m about to swim straight for the surface when Genevieve grabs me by the fin and points to the others, still floating in stasis around the pool. She reaches for Eddie and tries to get his attention, but it\u2019s as if he is asleep. She shakes him by the shoulders and I help, but there is no response. Finally, I reach up to his air tank and turn off the valve. A couple of seconds pass and his consciousness returns to him and he begins to thrash. I turn his air back on and he turns to me, looking furious. I interrupt his mad gesticulations to signal what I have just communicated to Genevieve:<\/p>\n The pool.<\/p>\n It\u2019s dangerous.<\/p>\n Predator.<\/p>\n At first he too looks confused. I can tell by the way his eyes shift back and forth, that he believes me. He makes a circle with his hand, signaling that we should round up the rest of them. He swims to Escobar and Genevieve goes to Maria. They try shaking them at first but eventually resort to turning off their air for a moment.<\/p>\n I swim over to Bill.<\/p>\n I can tell immediately that he is not like the others. Through his mask, his eyes are not vacant in the same way theirs were. They are heavy and bloodshot and stare into the pool with a kind of fevered intensity the others were not capable of. I try shaking his shoulders, although immediately his arm shoots up between us and knocks me away from him. I try to signal to him what I signaled to the others, that he is in danger. But he\u2019s not looking at me. His attention is absorbed by the teary eye in front of him. I look toward the others and they are fifteen feet above me now, watching, waiting for me. I wave them on. They hesitate, Genevieve, most of all, but the pool and the gore, the fact that there are no fish around — they\u2019re frightened. The silence no longer communicates safety, but an impending something that they do not wish to stick around for.<\/p>\n When I can see them all ascending I turn back to Bill and, swimming over top of him, turn off his air. Immediately he turns, begins to thrash, tries to reach behind him and turn it back on himself, but he cannot reach it. He grabs his dive knife from his calf and begins to slash it in my direction. I swim upwards, hoping that he\u2019ll follow me, and that, if we ascend far enough, I can turn it back on and he\u2019ll snap out of whatever state it is he\u2019s in. But it\u2019s as if he runs into a wall, because despite having no air to breathe, he does not follow me. His thrashing stops, although I can see he is still fully conscious. His arms float down to his side and the knife drops down and disappears inside the pool.<\/p>\n Then, something unexpected happens. I descend again, above Bill\u2019s head, which is now focused again on the pool, and I turn his air back on. He barely seems to notice, although I can see his limbs relax. I look at him for another moment and think back on the time he saved me underwater. It seems melodramatic to use the word, because, after all, I had plenty of air — I\u2019d just forgotten how to use it — but he did. He saved me. And all of those feelings flood back to me: a mixture of gratitude, resentment, and shame. I think of Genevieve at the surface waiting for me. The others too. I\u2019m the hero this time. I was the first to realize the pool\u2019s nature, what it was trying to do to us, and with one more glance in Bill\u2019s direction I turn and begin to ascend, the barren landscape of gore coming into full view again as I rise, and as the surface becomes brighter and brighter above me, I try not to think about whether I\u2019m being cruel or merciful to leave him, vengeful or kind. I can see the hull of the boat growing larger as I ascend, and just as I\u2019m about to break the surface I look back, can see that Bill is no longer there. Just that beautiful, teary eye, staring up at me.<\/p>\n NICK KIMBRO<\/strong> is a graduate student at the University of Colorado at Boulder. His fiction has appeared or is forthcoming in Spring Gun Journal<\/em>, Heavy Feather Review<\/em>, Weird Tales<\/em>, Space Squid<\/em>, and the new anthology Ocean Stories<\/em> from Elekrik Milkbath Press. He is recently married; his honeymoon was nowhere close to the ocean.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Nick Kimbro (go to page 2 –>) A man\u2019s honeymoon isn\u2019t the time to be discovering new phobias. Especially when what you\u2019re afraid of is water on a live-aboard halfway through its two-week voyage. I don\u2019t know what\u2019s the matter … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"parent":3154,"menu_order":2,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-3156","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P15duy-OU","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/3156","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3156"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/3156\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3212,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/3156\/revisions\/3212"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/3154"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.jerseydevilpress.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3156"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}} | |